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IN THIS ISSUE

• Kate Brookfield wraps up her account of a visit to Istanbul
• The result of the survey on the masthead appears above
• Dick Monaghan asks for help with - cooking?
• Barbara Wear forwards the story of a remarkable young man
• Tom Kyle admits to having a senior moment
• Bill McNeil tells the story of a talking clock
• Don Henderson sends a tale of an unlikely solution
• Carol Hansen, Jack Peaker, and Tom Williamson suggest sites

Kate Brookfield tells of their last day in

ISTANBUL

On January 16 it was still cold and wet, so we did the museums. First we walked to the National Archeology Museum, not far from Hagia Sophia. It was our second attempt to go as we tried on Monday, but it was closed. In fact, quite a few tourist places are closed on Mondays.

The wrought-iron gates to the museum are very elaborate. Inside the grounds there are three main buildings: the Archeology museum; the Enameled Kiosk Museum, and Ancient Eastern Works Museum. The Archeology museum was built in 1881 to display all the ancient sculptures found or brought to the city in its long history. It is built in Greek classical style and there is a lot of information about the construction and the man whose dream it was to build such a museum.

Outside is a stone sculpture of a bull, I think. It was pouring with rain and we did not wish to hang about taking photos outside. When you enter there are huge statues everywhere. There are three floors of exhibits and too much to describe in detail. Check my photo gallery.

The main attraction is the 4th century BC carved marble sarcophagus known as the ´Alexander Sarcophagus´, because of the carvings on both long sides depicting the exploits of Alexander the Great. One side shows Alexander fighting the Persians, and the other, Alexander hunting lions. He is recognizable in the battle scene as he is wearing a lion´s skin on his head. He is carrying a spear which was thought to have been made originally of silver, but now just the groove for the spear. It is thought to have been the sarcophagus of a king of Sidon as it was found in Sidon in the early 19th century, but some scholars now believe the sarcophagus was that of a Persian noble. It is huge structure built to resemble a Greek temple. The carvings are exquisite for the detail and precision, and I never cease to be amazed at the skill of people living so long ago. One short end portrays a panther-hunting scene; the other end depicts another battle. The lid or pediment shows scenes of a murder, possibly of the king who was buried in this elaborate sarcophagus. Close by is a model reconstruction of painted plaster that shows how the original sarcophagus would have looked. Some colour still shows on the original.

There is another huge sarcophagus known as the Sarcophagus of the Mourning Women because the carvings show a lot of women weeping for the departed. Another interesting exhibit is probably the oldest, maybe the first, Peace Treaty. It is known as the Kadesh Peace Treaty, signed between Ramses II of Egypt and Hattusili III of the Hittite Empire in 1258 BC. It is a clay copy of the original which was made in silver. Apparently, a large poster of this treaty is on the wall of the United Nations Headquarters in New York City.

The Enamelled Kiosk Museum is a very old round building dating back to the time of the first Sultan, Mehmed II. It houses many ornate enamels and tiles, copies of which are on sale in many of the shops.

We just had a quick look round the Ancient Eastern Works Museum. By this time, I was ready to eat and I find museums exhausting trying to take everything in.

After lunch and a rest we went out again in the rain to the Topkapi Palace. Many of you will have seen the film "Topkapi" with Peter Ustinov as a small-time Greek crook who meets up with yuppie-type professional thieves and they steal the emerald-encrusted dagger of Sultan Mehmed II. The most memorable scene is of the thief climbing into the museum through the roof, and suspended on a rope, manages to move between the infra-red beams thatwould set off the alarm. (I read somewhere that there is to be a remake of that classic due to be released this year.)

Istanbul has many palaces, but we only had time to visit the most famous one. The Topkapi palace was built in 1453 by Mehmed II after he conquered Constantinople and made the new city of Istanbul the centre of his growing Ottaman Empire. He chose an impressive site that was originally an olive garden. It is situated on a peninsula overlooking the sea of Marmara and the Bosphorus. Originally, the palace was surrounded by huge walls and gates. This was the heart of the Ottoman Empire that lasted for over 400 years. Today, there are remnants of the walls and one gate remains standing.

When Mehmed II invaded Constantinope he was only 23 years old, and he had big dreams of conquering the world. His grand palace reflects those ambitions. Over the years subsequent Sultans added to it. The palace was not just a residence, but included administrative buildings, courts, throne room, harem, pools, gardens, etc. Today it is a palace museum. I recommend a Google search for this palace. This site gives a panoramic view of the palace:

http://www.ee.bilkent.edu.tr/~history/topkapi.html

One of the rooms displays all the artifacts used by the different Sultans. Each Sultan had his own personal dagger, encrusted with jewels. Mehmet´s emerald dagger, the one stolen in the movie, "Topkapi" is not the most elaborate, although the emeralds are huge. It is not in its own case in the centre of the room, under the dome as shown in the film. In fact, you could miss it, as it is in a case with a lot of other bejewelled artifacts: writing boxes, picture frames, mirrors, all made of gold and heavily encrusted with diamonds, rubies, emeralds.

The exhibits that fascinated me were all the awards and medals presented to the last Sultan from all the major nations. I forget the names of all the honours, but the British Order of the Garter was one. There were similar high national honours from France, Russia, Sweden, India, and many other countries.

Some of the original holy relics from Hagia Sophia are on display here: such things as fingers of saints, but I think one has to be a bit gullible to believe they are what they say they are - "bread from the feeding of the five thousand" - but such attractions brought the early pilgrims and their money to Byzantium. What surprises me most is that the Ottomans kept these relics safe.

On our return we stopped at Istanbul´s famous Grand Bazaar. This has got to be one of the earliest shopping malls. It is a huge glass-covered market selling everything Turkish you might like to buy: carpets, ceramic tiles - many in the famous patterns seen at the Topkapi Palace - pottery, copper and brassware, leather goods, cotton and wool, alabaster ornaments, jewellery, trinkets, Turkish Delight, and other food items. You name it, you could get it here.

There are also many restaurants and cafes. I bought a tile of the tulip period for my nephew, who had been spending days deciding on tiles for his bathroom renovation. I priced a teapot for my sister-in-law, who collects teapots - 120 Lira for a four-cup pot! When I walked away, the shopkeeper offered me a two-cup pot for 60 lira, but I was in no mood for bartering. We had just come from a café where I told Mike he had to have glass of traditional Turkish tea. When I was in Turkey in the mid 1960s we would stop at a char shop for a glass of tea, which was very refreshing even in hot weather. In the Grand Bazaar in 2008, we were charged 10 lira! I was horrified at such a charge just because it was in the Grand Bazaar. So we decided we did not need to buy anything and went back to our hotel. (My photos of the Bazaar are no good. The sun had set by the time we got there. But, for the curious, a Google image search for "Grand Bazaar, Istanbul" will show you what it looks like.

That evening we ate in our hotel and had an early night as we had to be packed and ready to leave for the airport the next morning. By this time, it was cold and wet in Istanbul. A week later, we saw scenes of traffic mayhem in Istanbul as they had snow for the first time in years. I am certainly glad that we missed that snowy day!

SURVEY RESULTS

Thank you to all who sent replies to my question about which masthead you preferred for The Spinner. I received 45 answers, in which 21 preferred the new header, 10 liked the old one, and 21 had no preference.

Considering that a number of you had technical problems with the Easter graphic; that it complicated the process for at least two people who are compiling copies of all the issues; and that almost half of you do not care which header is used, I have decided to stay with the old ASCII format. For those who prefer the more colourful version, I suggest they bookmark Jay´s or Burke Dykes´ site:

http://members.shaw.ca/vjsansum/ and http://www.nw-seniorsonline.org/stories.html

Those who preferred the old version were more committed to it than those who liked the new one. Robin Angelini wrote: "I like the old ASCII better just because of nostalgia for the ´old days´. You know, 15 - 20 years ago when we were Darksiders and the internet wasn´t quite the world wide web." (Robin refers to the former MindLink board when we used to chat after midnight because it was free.;)

Mike DiCola wrote: "With no disrespect intended re Jay´s masthead, I confess I like the old one better - its rendition as an image made of ASCII characters always represented, for me, what the Tale Spinner is all about - a web of stories, jokes, and colourful yarns made of keyboard characters and some wonderful assembly by your many contributors. I don´t dislike the artwork; I just like the original more as a front page for the Tale Spinner."

As a concession to those who preferred "the Technicolor version," as Kate Brookfield called it, I will ask Jay to let me use the headers for the holiday editions in which he uses special illustrations.

I have long envied the readability of Jay´s and Burke Dyke´s sites, with their shorter lines, larger type, and clean formats, but practicality and nostalgia have decided me to stay with the old masthead. Thank you all again for expressing your opinion.

Dick Monaghan writes:

HOW ABOUT A LITTLE HELP HERE?

Every fry-cook in every greasy spoon on the North American continent can fry eggs "over easy." I can´t. No matter how I start out, I end up with scrambled eggs.

If I try to flip them over, the yolks either break when they hit the skillet, or the white part folds under. If I manage to preserve them at this point, they break when I shove the spatula under them to get them out of the pan.

Why am I cursed in this brazen manner? I even followed my wife´s advice and quit trying to cook everything on "high" (on the theory that the hotter the fire, the quicker the meal), but even when I exercise the patience of Job with the burner on "medium," I get the same dreary result.

Anybody got any suggestions? I´ve thought of using two frying pans, putting them mouth-to-mouth and turning them over, but really don´t have the nerve to try.

Suggestions are welcome.

Barbara Wear forwarded this article by Cate Lecuyer from the Salem News of Tuesday, March 8, 2008, about one of the professors at Endicott College and her son:

TEEN RAISES CASH AND HOPES FOR OPERATION SMILE

"I went right to the operating room as soon as I was born," said Brian Ake, who had a severe cleft lip and was missing both sides of his palate.

"From the tip of his nose to the lower lip was basically a hole," his mother, Margaret, said. Starting when he was 30 days old, doctors repaired his face in a series of steps. By the time he was three months old, the hole was basically connected, but he would undergo other minor procedures throughout his life.

From a medical standpoint, the surgery helped him breathe and eat; from a social standpoint, it prevented him from starting life as an outcast.

Ake wants to give others a smilar opportunity. On March 10, he and his mother were traveling to Cambodia with a group of volunteer doctors through Operation Smile, a no-nprofit agency that sends medical teams aroud the world to repair facial deformities in children and some adults and helps educate people about proper hygiene and health.

Cleft lips are often genetic but can also result if a mother is sick during the early stages of pregnancy. About one in 800 babies is born with a cleft lip in developed countries, like the United States, and about one in 500 in undeveloped countries, said Lisa Jones, public relations coordinator for Operation Smile.

"We´re lucky in this country to have access to good health care," she said. "Many cases go untreated in other parts of the world."

"I couldn´t imagine what these kids go through," Ake said. "A lot of them are abandoned by their families and put into orphanges."

He hopes to raise $24,000, enough to help 100 kids - and is creating a video documentary for his senior internship at Masconoment Regional High School.

"I started thinking about this last summer when I was lying around thinking I needed to do an internship," Ake said. He didn´t want to get stuck bagging groceries and writing a paper about it.

"I wanted to do something exciting and fun," he said. So far, he´s raised $18,600. Donations have poured in from the campaign website he created through Operation Smile, an online Facebook group he created, and friends from a golf course on Cape Cod where he is a member.

The final hurrah is a fashion show on March 5, at Endicott College with an "Old Fashioned Hollywoood" theme. More than 50 students, faculty, and staff will model outfits from classic movies like "Casablanca" and "Grease". Ake´s mother, who´s an Endicott professor and faculty advisor to Delta Epsilon Chi (DEX), which is sponsoring the show, will sport black leather pants, red heels, and a big blond wig as she struts down the runway as Sandy.

Ake will stand in front of between 400-500 people and make a presentation about Operation Smile.

It wasn´t until Ake started working on this project that he began to open up about his own cleft lip.

"We´re in a country that wants to be perfect," he said. "When someone isn´t, you have that in the back of your mind. You´re not like other kids."

But working with Operation Smile introduced him to other kids with cleft lips and he found he wanted to help those less fortunate than himself.

"I just want to give back to make their lives better," he said.

P.S. DEX raised over $4,000 to donate to Operation Smile.

Ed. Note: To read a blog Margaret wrote on their trip to Cambodia, go to the following site and start at the bottom, because the first entry is there:

http://akesincambodia.blogspot.com/

Tom Kyle asks:

DID YOU SEND ME THIS?

Hearing a knock at the door, the little boy answered it.

Meanwhile, from upstairs, his mother called down to him, "Who is at the door"?

He called back: "There is a man at the door collecting for the Old Folks´ Home. Should I give him Grandpa?"

ED. NOTE: I certainly did not send it to Tom - this pot would not dare to call the kettle black!

Bill McNair forwards this one about

THE TALKING CLOCK

A drunk was showing his new apartment to a couple of friends late one night. He led the way to his bedroom where there was a gong and mallet.

"What´s that big brass gong?" one of the guests asked.

"It´s not a gong. It´s a talking clock," the drunk replied.

"Seriously?" asked his astonished friend.

"Yup," replied the drunk.

"How´s it work?" the friend asked, squinting at it.

"Watch," the drunk replied. He picked up the mallet, gave the gong a whack and stepped back.The three stood looking at one another for a moment. Then someone on the other side of the wall screamed,

"You stupid idiot, it´s three-fifteen in the morning."

Don Henderson tells the story of

GRANDPA IN HOSPITAL

A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in hospital.

"How are you, Grandpa? he asks.

"Feeling fine," says the old man.

"What´s the food like?"

"Terrific, wonderful menus."

"And the nursing?"

"Just couldn´t be better. These young nurses really take care of you."

"What about sleeping? Do you sleep OK?"

"No problem at all, nine hours solid every night. At 10 o´clock they bring me a cup of hot chocolate and a Viagra tablet ... and that´s it. I go out like a light."

The grandson is puzzled and a little alarmed by this, so rushes off to question the nurse in charge."What are you people doing," he says. "I´m told you´re giving an 85-year-old Viagra on a daily basis. Surely that can´t be true?"

"Oh, yes," replies the nurse. "Every night at 10 o´clock we give him a cup of chocolate and a Viagra tablet. It works wonderfully well. The chocolate makes him sleep, and the Viagra stops him from rolling out of bed."

RECOMMENDED WEBSITES

Carol Hansen sent an article from The Skeptic magazine in which Steve Salerno points out that "broadcast journalism is flawed in such a fundamental way that its utility as a tool for informing viewers is almost nil." This is an important opinion in these times of political unrest, climate change fears, and reports of rising crime rates. To read this long but important article go to

www.skeptic.com/eskeptic/08-02-13.html

Jack Peaker suggests that you go to this link even if you´re not a golfer:

Tom Williamson forwards this site for a condensed version of 50 years of history:

Here is a site you may relate to all too well:

"In three words I can sum up everything I´ve learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost