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whew !!!

IN THIS ISSUE

• Ann Kemp writes a lengthy excuse for being late
• Anne Ramamut and Jean Sterling comment on last week´s issue
• Catherine Green forwards an inspiring story about a father
• Bruce Galway asks if you know these simple facts
• Irene Harvalias reminds us of the solution to a computer problem
• Miriam Ockenden´s story is about a persistent salesman
• Jack Peaker tells about a memorable anniversary
• Jay passes on a woman´s random thoughts
• Carol Hansen, Jack Peaker, and Miriam Ockenden suggest websites

Ann Kemp, one of my long-ago library aides, now lives in the Okanagan, but when she can make it, she still joins us in our thrice-yearly luncheons. This year she did not answer my reminder of the fall lunch, which was surprising, but she explains the delay with this reply:

A VISIT TO LANDS DOWN UNDER

You will be wondering why you didn´t hear from me. Well, guess what, we were away. We were in Australia, starting in Sydney, visiting friends and relatives.

Then we went to the centre to Ayers Rock, Kings Canyon, and Alice Springs. Lots of colourful rocks, sunsets, sunrises, and interesting walks. We also went to the Royal Flying Doctor Centre, the School of the Air, the original telegraph station, and several other things in Alice Springs.

Next we went to Kununurra via Darwin. This town is the gateway to the Kimberley wilderness area. We had a lovely boat ride on the River Ord where we saw crocs, bats, and all kinds of birds. Then we went on a six-seater plane into a wilderness camp, where we slept in tent cabins. We had some great walks into the most amazing gorges. In one spot it was so narrow we had to go sideways. The sheer high red rocks towered above us, making us look very small. We met some interesting people and had good times together, especially over dinner outside at night.

Next stop, Broome, on the north-west coast, a famous pearling area, with an interesting history. It´s a pleasant town and has a beautiful 20-km-long sandy beach - lovely for walks.

Perth was our next port of call, where we stayed with a cousin of John´s. She gave us a great time including going to one of the wine areas. Perth is a beautiful city, so clean, lots of parks and water (river, but very wide).

On our way home we stopped in Bangkok and met up with a guide that I had had in 2000. He was thrilled to see us and be able to show John all the things plus more that I had seen in 2000. It´s a busy, polluted city but fascinating. The temples are spectacular and every Buddha we saw seemed to be bigger than the last! The markets are fun and an eye opener, especially the floating market. We tried out various modes of transportation including Tuk Tuks and long-tailed boats.

Our last night was spent in Singapore as there wasn´t a flight out to Vancouver until the next morning. Now, there it is so clean I think you could eat off the sidewalk. I also like it there.

Then back home and straight into apple picking and harvesting veggies. The weather is gorgeous so it´s nice to be outside. Well, I think that explains why you didn´t see me in September!

CORRESPONDENCE

Anne Rahamut writes about an ambitious undertaking:

Please extend my thanks to Jack Peaker for one of this week´s web-site picks: milebymile.com.

Last May, I started to walk across Canada. I began in Victoria, following the Trans-Canada Highway, using <transcanadahighway.com> that divides the whole highway into sections, with the distances marked, and with some info and photos of places along the way.

Every morning, I re-zero my pedometer and then go about my daily routines. Every night I tally my advance across the country. At the moment I´m on the last BC leg, between Revelstoke and the Alberta border, 220 km.

My plan is to keep at it until I reach St. John´s, NF. Then my husband and I will fly there for a holiday. A couple of years ago we camped around NF, but we were locked into the ferry schedule and at the end of our stay we had a decision to make - one more peninsula or St. Johns´. We chose the peninsula on the grounds that next time we could concentrate wholely on St. John´s. I expect this project of mine, unless I walk more than my average 5 km per day, will take me over 4 years to complete.

I shall add the milebymile web-site to my computer file so that as I progress across the country, I can have different images of the terrain, the sights, the towns, etc, through which I am passing.

~~~~~

Jean Sterling writes: Enjoyed your story - and I thought the most exciting drivers were in Montreal and Rome! Also enjoyed the jokes.

My computer wouldn´t open the attachment, which I assume was a Thanksgiving greeting.

Ed. Note: Many people had the same problem. I suspect it was incompatibility between my Mac and their PCs, and next time, if I ever dare to use a graphic again, I will be sure it is in a suitable format. The added material at the end of the letter which some readers also got was entirely the fault of the publisher. Too many late nights. ;)

Catherine Green forwards this inspiring story written by Rick Reilly:

STRONGEST DAD IN THE WORLD

I try to be a good father. Give my kids mulligans. Work nights to pay for their text messaging. Take them to swimsuit shoots.

But consider Dick Hoyt.

Eighty-five times he´s pushed his disabled son, Rick, 26.2 miles in marathons. Eight times he´s not only pushed him 26.2 miles in a wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dinghy while swimming and pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars--all in the same day.

Dick´s also pulled him cross-country skiing, taken him on his back mountain climbing and once hauled him across the U.S. on a bike. Makes taking your son bowling look a little lame, right?

And what has Rick done for his father? Not much - except save his life.

This love story began in Winchester, Mass., 43 years ago, when Rick was strangled by the umbilical cord during birth, leaving him brain- damaged and unable to control his limbs.

"He´ll be a vegetable the rest of his life," Dick says doctors told him and his wife, Judy, when Rick was nine months old. "Put him in an institution."

But the Hoyts weren´t buying it. They noticed the way Rick´s eyes followed them around the room. When Rick was 11 they took him to the engineering department at Tufts University and asked if there was anything to help the boy communicate. "No way," Dick says he was told. "There´s nothing going on in his brain."

"Tell him a joke," Dick countered. They did. Rick laughed. Turns out a lot was going on in his brain.

Rigged up with a computer that allowed him to control the cursor by touching a switch with the side of his head, Rick was finally able to communicate. First words? ``Go Bruins!" And after a high school classmate was paralyzed in an accident and the school organized a charity run for him, Rick pecked out, "Dad, I want to do that."

Yeah, right. How was Dick, a self-described "porker" who never ran more than a mile at a time, going to push his son five miles? Still, he tried. "Then it was me who was handicapped," Dick says. "I was sore for two weeks."

That day changed Rick´s life. "Dad," he typed, "when we were running, it felt like I wasn´t disabled anymore!"

And that sentence changed Dick´s life. He became obsessed with giving Rick that feeling as often as he could. He got into such hard-belly shape that he and Rick were ready to try the 1979 Boston Marathon.

"No way," Dick was told by a race official. The Hoyts weren´t quite a single runner, and they weren´t quite a wheelchair competitor. For a few years Dick and Rick just joined the massive field and ran anyway, then they found a way to get into the race officially: In 1983 they ran another marathon so fast they made the qualifying time for Boston the following year.

Then somebody said, "Hey, Dick, why not a triathlon?"

How´s a guy who never learned to swim and hadn´t ridden a bike since he was six going to haul his 110-pound kid through a triathlon? Still, Dick tried.

Now they´ve done 212 triathlons, including four grueling 15-hour Ironmans in Hawaii. It must be a buzzkill to be a 25-year-old stud getting passed by an old guy towing a grown man in a dinghy, don´t you think?

"Hey, Dick, why not see how you´d do on your own?" "No way," he says. Dick does it purely for "the awesome feeling" he gets seeing Rick with a cantaloupe smile as they run, swim, and ride together.

This year, at ages 65 and 43, Dick and Rick finished their 24th Boston Marathon, in 5,083rd place out of more than 20,000 starters. Their best time? Two hours, 40 minutes in 1992 - only 35 minutes off the world record, which, in case you don´t keep track of these things, happens to be held by a guy who was not pushing another man in a wheelchair at the time.

"No question about it," Rick types. "My dad is the Father of the Century."

And Dick got something else out of all this too. Two years ago he had a mild heart attack during a race. Doctors found that one of his arteries was 95% clogged. "If you hadn´t been in such great shape," one doctor told him, "you probably would´ve died 15 years ago."

So, in a way, Dick and Rick saved each other´s life.

Rick, who has his own apartment (he gets home care) and works in Boston, and Dick, retired from the military and living in Holland, Mass., always find ways to be together. They give speeches around the country and compete in some backbrea king race every weekend, including last Father´s Day.

That night, Rick bought his dad dinner, but the thing he really wants to give him is a gift he can never buy.

"The thing I´d most like," Rick types, "is that my dad sit in the chair and I push him once."

Check out their video at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryCTIigaloQ

Bruce Galway asks

DID YOU KNOW?

People who live in glass houses should make love in the basement.

Never read the fine print. There ain´t no way you´re going to like it.

If you let a smile be your umbrella, then most likely your rear will get soaking wet.

The only two things we do with greater frequency in middle age are urinate and attend funerals.

The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.

To err is human, to forgive - highly unlikely.

Do you realize that in about 40 years, we´ll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?

Money can´t buy happiness - but somehow it´s more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai.

Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.

Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.

After a certain age, if you don´t wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead.

Irene Harvalias reminds us of a

COMMON COMPUTER PROBLEM

I was having trouble with my computer, so I called Harold, the computer guy, to come over. Harold clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum service call.

As he was walking away, I called after him, "So, what was wrong?"

He replied, "It was an ID ten T error."

I didn´t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, "An, ID ten T error? What´s that ... in case I need to fix it again?"

Harold grinned. "Haven´t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?"

"No," I replied.

"Write it down," he said, "and I think you´ll figure it out."

So I wrote down. I D 1 0 T

I used to like Harold.

Miriam Ockenden sends this story about a persistent

DOOR-TO-DOOR SALESMAN

A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner. "Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners." "Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven´t got any money! I´m broke!" and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed wide open. "Don´t be too hasty!" he said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration." And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure on to her hallway carpet.

"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."

The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I hope you´ve got a damned good appetite, because they cut off my electricity this morning." What part of broke do you not understand?

Jack Peaker forwards this story about

A MEMORABLE ANNIVERSARY

A man and his wife were celebrating 50 years together. Their three kids, all very successful, agreed to a Sunday dinner in their honor.

"Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad," gushed son number one. "Sorry I´m running late. I had an emergency at the hospital with a patient, you know how it is, and didn´t have time to get you a gift."

"Not to worry," said the father. "The important thing is that we´re all together today."

Son number two arrived and announced, "You and Mom look great, Dad. I just flew in from Vancouver between depositions and didn´t have time to shop for you."

"It´s nothing," said the father. "We´re glad you were able to come."

Just then the daughter arrived, "Hello and happy anniversary! I´m sorry, but my boss is sending me out of town and I was really busy packing, so I didn´t have time to get you anything."

Again the father said, "I really don´t care; at least the five of us are together today."

After they had finished dessert, the father said, "There´s something your mother and I have wanted to tell you for a long time. You see, we were very poor. Despite this, we were able to send each of you to college. Throughout the years your mother and I knew that we loved each other very much but we just never found the time to get married."

The three children gasped and said, "You mean we´re bastards?"

"Yes," said the father. "And cheap ones too."

Jay sends this one:

A WOMAN´S RANDOM THOUGHTS

I read this article that said typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, smoking too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a perfect day.

Skinny people piss me off! Especially when they say things like, "You know, sometimes I forget to eat." Now I´ve forgotten my address, my mother´s maiden name, and my keys. But I´ve never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat.

A friend of mine confused her valium with her birth control pills. She had 14 kids, but she doesn´t give a damn.

They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn´t all that communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, "Body, how´d you like to go to the six o´clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell my body said, "Listen, you ... do it and you die."

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then they marry him.

I know what Victoria´s Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff.

If men can run the world, why can´t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your neck?

THIS WEEK´S WEBSITES

Carol Hansen suggests a timely site:

http://www.wtv-zone.com/Mary/DANCEOFTHELEAVES.HTML

~~~~~

Jack Peaker forwards these suggestions:

Migraines: http://www.migraineclinic.ca/
Graphics & Photos: http://www.firstgov.gov/index.shtml
Bunnies: http://www.talkingegg.com/humor/bunnyyawns.html\
Excel Tutorial: http://www.usd.edu/trio/tut/excel/
Health: http://www.healthnewsreview.org/
Genealogy: http://www.theshipslist.com/

~~~~~

Miriam Ockenden says this is not so easy ... and she´s right! Considering that this part of the world is center stage, a geography lesson is in order. Try it and see how you do.

http://www.rethinkingschools.org/just_fun/games/mapgame.html

~~~~~

You can also read this newsletter online at http://members.shaw.ca/vjsansum/and http://www.nw-seniorsonline.org/stories.html

"Information´s pretty thin stuff unless mixed with experience."